Silly SMS jokes 5

Silly SMS jokes 5

Sardar: Aap kitna padhe ho?

Friend: B.A.

Sardar: kamal karte ho yaar, sirf do word padhe aur woh bhi ulte.

"Barish hue bheeg gaye hum"

"Barish hue bheeg gaye hum"

Fir kya,

"Rajnikanth ne phuk maari sukh gaye hum"!

PATNI NE KAR DI THI

PATI KI ESS BAAT PAR DHULAI

KI USNE " PATI PARMESWAR" FILM Q NAHI DIKHAI....

Faqir:Madam Bhuka hu,Khuda k naam pr khana dedo

Mam:Khana abi nai bana

Faqir:Facebook pe BABA Pappu ke naam se hu,ban jaye to WALL pe post kardena...

Bijlee ki taar or ladki mai kya similarty hai???

Guess..

Not Sure

Oh Come on Yaar Simple Yaar

Dono Nangi ho toh jaan nikaal deti hai

Silly SMS jokes 4

Silly SMS jokes 4

Teacher- Netaji, apka beta fail ho gaya he aur aap laddu khila rahe he?

Netaji- 70 ladko ki class me 60 fail hai, bahumat to mere bete k sath he.

A Cockroach To A Young Guy:

"I Can Make Your Girlfriend Scream,

More Louder Than You Can...

If Mallika Shehrawat plays Dropadi in Mahabharat..

Duryodhan will say... Dussashan, pehna do bhabhi

ko saari, hum bhi to dekhen yeh vastron mein kaisi lagti hai...

khuda kare tera mobile kho jaye

mile mughe aur mera ho jaye

karu sms ladikyo ko naam tera aaye

Maar tughe pare aur mazza mughe aaye

Snta-Ye Chhota Medal Tumhe Kyu Mila H?

Bnta-Gane K Liye,

Snta-Aur Ye Bada Wala?

Bnta-Apna Gana Band Krne K Lie

In an African Safari, A LION suddenly bounced on Santa's wife.

WIFE-Shoot him! Shoot him!

SANTA-Yes Yes.I'm changing d battery of my camera..

santa:-yaar mera kutta kho gaya hai. Main kya karu?

Banta:abe tu paper me kyo nahi de deta ki tera kutta kho gaya.

Santa: chup kar sale mera kutta pada likha nahi hai.

Silly SMS Jokes 3

Silly SMS Jokes 3

Teacher to KG Kid: Hw many months in a year?

Kid: 12

Teacher: How did u knw?

Kid: Baara mahine me bara tarike se tujhko pyar jataunga re!

DHINKA CHIKA DHINKA CHIKA DHINKA CHIKA

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Heart touching lines.. Thousand words of any teacher does not hurt much.. But the silence of a friend in the examination hall brings tears to the eyes..!

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Who is the most lucky man of this week.?

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Kanimozi's husband ofcourse....

Rs.214 Cr in hand and wife is in the jail

enjoy man..!!

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U S A: Hamare DOG Football khelte hai?

JAPAN: Hamari FISH dance Karti hai?

CHINA: Hamare HATHI cycle chalate hai?

INDIA: HAMARE GADHE DESH CHALATE HAI

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Osama to Amitabh : How are you ?

Amitabh : Bas kabhi Khushi kabhi gam, Aur aap ??

Osama; Bas kabhi gola kabhi Bum

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WIFE- kitna pyar karte ho mujhse?

HUSBAND- Shahjahan jaisa.

WIFE- To Tajmahal banwao.

HUSBAND- Zameen kharid li h, bus tumhare mrne ka intezaar kr rha hu.

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Lalu thanking obama after his stay in america-

Thank you for ur hospitality.when you come 2 india.god promis, i wil also hospitalise u.....

Silly SMS jokes 2

Silly SMS jokes 

 

LAZINESS is the 'father' of all bad habits..
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But ultimately he is a father & we should respect him!
-
-Be Lazy,
Think Crazy!
 

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Soul1: How did u die?
Soul2: Due 2 cold U?
S1: I doubted my wife with a man & searched my house,
found none, felt guilty & suicided
S2: Ha ha i was in d Fridge..

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Spiritual thought for d day-
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Faithful boyfrnds will go straight to heaven..
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Unfaithful boyfrnds are already enjoying...
HEAVEN on Earth.

Silly SMS Jokes

Silly SMS Jokes

-I intend to live forever- so far so good

-Some say the glass is half empty, Some say the glass is half full, I say "are you gonna drink that?"

-Iv got 2 sit down & work out where i stand!!!

-Wen u smile the world smiles with u.wen ur down people will rally behind u.but wen u fart u r alone coz people will never stand by u!

-Maturity is knowing when and where to be immature

-All of my friends and I are crazy.Thats what keeps us sane!

-if barbie is so popular....then y do u have 2 buy her friends?

engagement
One day Santas Girlfriend asks him, Darling, om our Engagement will you give me a RING?Santa:Ya sure, Give me ur Telephone No.


teacher
When i open my eyes every morning i pray to God that everyone should have a friend like you.... Why should only i suffer!!!


What did shivaji say to bruce lee when he met him?
" tu karate main marathe".


Santa-Banta
Teacher ne kaha-translate hindi to english, "khushi ke maare uski chhaati phool gai".

Santa translated-"Due to happiness his chest turned into breast"!!!

-people ask me if id pefer 2 go 2 hell or heaven i say hell coz its nice and warm down there

-Im a nobody.. nobodys perfect.. therefore IM PERFECT!!!

-I didnt kiss ur boyfriend! I told his lips a secret!!

-I would stop eating chocolate.. but I'm not a quitter!


domestic affairs
"The General was essentially a man of peace,
except of course in his domestic affairs."
Oscar Wilde


Speak
Since light travel faster than sound...

People appear bright until you hear them speak...

Marry
Every man should marry....

After all happiness is not the only thing in life...

pakau sms 8

pakau sms


Sharukh Khan aur Kajol bus stop


Sharukh Khan aur Kajol bus stop pe khade hain. Kajol chali gayi, par Sharukh bus mein nahin chada - 
kyon??
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think....
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Kyonke woh Kajol ko chhodne aaya tha..lol






Ek aur muaka de hi dete hain


Ek aur muaka de hi dete hain tumhe ..... 
kamal,vimal do bhai they,dono bus stop pe khade the.. 
bus aai vimal chad jata hai per! kamal nahin jata hai
why???
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Kyonkieeeeee bus per likha tha ONLY VIMAL






Amitabh aur Pran dono bus


Amitabh aur Pran dono bus estop pe khade the... 
bus
aai aur Pran chad jata hai per Amitabh nahin jata
Qyo???
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pran jaye per bacchan na jaye

Pakau Shayaries

Pakau Shayaries...

Teri adao pe main 
Teri adao pe main jaun waari waari...
Dial 139 for railway enquiry.

Na jine ki arzu na
Na jine ki arzu na marne ka khauf
The number you are trying is currently switched off.

Apne gamo ko bas
Apne gamo ko bas dil me daba lo
Naya godrej powder hair dye, Bas kaato kholo or laga lo

pakau sms 7

Ek bar ekk haathi tha.........


ek bar ekk haathi tha. uske samne na 11 kele the. usne na 10 kha leye. 1 ni khaya bata kyo?
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kyonki ek kela plastic ka tha !!!
hahahahaha............... .




Is baar fir hathi tha.......
is baar fir hathi tha..fir 11 kele.. usne 11 k 11 nai khaye.. bata kyo?
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is baar hathi plastic ka tha!!!
hahahahaha............... 






Is baar asli hathi tha......... 
is baar asli hathi tha.. asli 11 kele. usne 11 k 11 nai khaye .. bata kyo?
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kyonki kele tv me the!!
hahahahaha...............






Is baar fir asli hathi tha........
is baar fer asli hathi tha,.. asli 11 kele.. hathi aur kele dono he tv me the.. usne phir ni khaye.. bata kyo?
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kyonki dono alag alag channel pe the!!
hahahahaha............... 








Is baar fer asli hathi.............. 
is baar fer asli hathi .. asli 11 kele.. hathi aur kele dono tv me.. ek he channel pe .. usne phir ni khaye .. bata kyo?
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kyonki tv band tha!!
hahahahaha...............

pakau sms 6

Shruti to Shraxis




Why did the girl changed her name from Shruti to Shraxis?


Socho… kyun….. ???
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.Aur thoda socho....


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Ans: Because UTI bank is now Axis bank






Prasad ask's Kumble to bring a pepsi


Prasad ask's Kumble to bring a pepsi... Kumble brings a bottle of pepsi but goes directly to Tendulkar. 
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?why ?? :-)
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Tendulkar is an opener...






What will u call a person


What will u call a person who is leaving India??
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Socho...............
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Hindustan Lever (Leaver). 







Jackie Chan ki saas


Jackie Chan ki saas ka naam kya hai?.. 
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nahi pata..??
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answer: D'Cold


chain ki saans lo - D'cold




chalo ab batao...
Jackie Chan ki bahu ka naam kya hai ?
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this is quite simple...
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answer) D'Cold again
kyunki saans bhi kabhi bahu thi